As a father of 3, I am regularly asked the question “Where do I find the time?”

The questions increase when they find out that I have a blog, and they wonder where do I find the time to blog, on top of my working and family time?

Granted that I only picked up blogging a few years ago, blogging was not exactly in my blood. Coupled with the fact that having 3 kids is quite a sizeable number in “Baby-shy” Singapore, many people always ask how we cope?

Well, the #1 advice that I always give to family and friends, is don’t forget “ME” time!

As working professionals, we spend a good time of our day in the office. On average, a Singaporean spends at least 9 hours or more at the office, and when we get home, we are tired. However, upon reaching the house, we are faced with another set of problems. From office politics, we find ourselves burdened with family politics. We are transformed into “Sergeant Majors” who make sure that vegetables are eaten, to Professional Umpires who settle important playground disputes. The day seems to get longer and longer, and when it’s time to sit on your favourite sofa, it’s time to go to bed.

Inevitably, couples don’t have much time to do anything together, and one can forget about “dating” your partner.

So what is my solution?

The best life-saver that I have found in my 8 years of Parenting is…

1. Get the kids to sleep early!

Sleep is not just essential for the children’s development, but for your development as well! Yes! When the kids are asleep, that is when you will find the peace in the house to not just have some “ME” time, but also time for yourself to catch up with your partner.

I used to think that it is nice for the kids to wake up for Daddy and Mummy, so that when the parents come home, we can get to spend some time with the kids.  However, Staying awake past 9pm is not just unhealthy for the children’s development, but in terms of lifestyle, it is definitely not a healthy lifestyle for the kids to cultivate.

Furthermore, two wrongs don’t make a right. The problem of working long hours is a problem…and making the kids stay up late to make up for our indiscretions seems counter productive. Instead, we are the solution to our own problems!  We should be thinking and making decisions that will bring us home earlier.

When the kids sleep early, not only has Daddy and Mummy time to do their own things, but a chance to unwind and do their own things. With that extra amount of time, you will find the time to develop a healthy lifestyle, and time to bring your partner out for a movie date as well! After all, you do want to be able to have the ability to enjoy your grandchildren in the years to come

Yes! And because the kids sleep early, that is where I can find the time to blog and catch up with the English Premier League as well!

If you child was born in the months of Oct-Dec, would you deliberately delay his/her entry into Pre-School?

Parents in America are deliberately doing just that!

“Redshirting” as it is termed is on the rise in society today! This is the practise of holding children back from kindergarten so they can start school at age 6 – older, bigger, and more mature than their 5-year-old peers.

The reason being is that some research shows that redshirting will give these youngsters an edge in school, and maybe even in life. As little Johnny will be bigger and more developed than his friends, it means that he can run faster and jump higher than the friends that he has in class! This also results in little Johnny being given leadership positions, and a higher probability of being Captain of the football team!  

This theory has been made popular by Malcolm Gladwell. In his book “Outliers”,  we are introduced to the term “cumulative advantage". This study shows that when you are given that little advantage when you are 6, it means that you are slightly better positioned when you’re 7, and this means you’re slightly better positioned when you’re 8, and so on. The advantage rolls on exponentially and it results in a more confident and assured Johnny!

Well…the advantage sounds fantastic, and this theory has got parents in the States holding back their kids, so that they can have a little bit more of an advantage when they enter pre-school.

Although Singaporeans will not be able to do this in the Singapore Education System when they hit Primary School, but I wonder if some Singaporean Parents have tried it at Pre-School?

According to CBS, the studies are not conclusive, but with Malcolm Gladwell’s book being a Best-Seller, I am sure that such theories will be of great interest to parents in competitive Singapore.

Do watch the Video, as it gives a very interesting presentation to the whole issue:

Recently, the talks about regulating pre-school education is resurfacing.There has been talk about getting the government to regulate the industry, as there is such a great disparity in Pre School education.

As any parent, all of us want the Best for our kids, and I have witnessed the positive effects of a good healthy environment which stimulates a pre-schooler. Generally, kids which are put in a good learning environment seem to be more ready for school – as they seem to be more confident and more vocal. With higher teacher-student ratios in Government Supported Preschools as compared to Private Schools, I do believe that teachers also find it difficult to teach and hold the attention of energetic pre-schoolers.

However, there are many more issues on the horizon, as with the increasing focus paid on pre-schoolers, the bad news is that the cost of the Private School seems to be increasing every year. Enrolment fees go up by at least 10% a year, far outstripping inflation and the rise in teacher’s salaries. Somehow,I think that they are just maximizing the fact that Parents rarely schools, as we just want a stable and familiar environment for the children.

In view of these rising school fees, I feel that it would be good to regulate the industry. I really feel that it will be fantastic, if I could pay normal school fees, for a school that is doing a decent job in the preschool industry.  When we leave an industry to market forces, it is inevitable that that businesses will just go for profits!

In terms of quality education, my wife and I have been to many preschools to visit and we have done our own comparisons. The educational choices available are a smorgasbord! There’s an endless possibility on what is offered. Let me give you an example. I’ll just focus on TEACHERS.

We have qualified teachers in Early Childhood development, and those without. And there are those with additional qualifications like Childhood Music Appreciation, Dance or Learning Abilities. Above that, there are teachers who have practical experience, and those without. And there are those who are young and energetic, with enough zest in them to keep up with the young kids. And on the other end, there are the older teachers with little drive or energy to run, let alone keep up with two small boys.

The famous founders of Google are graduates from Montessori, and they credit their independent thinking to the childhood foundations implanted into them.

However, as many Parents today are paying through the “nose” for a Montessori school, the sad fact is that NOT all schools are genuine Montessori Schools. In fact, a school does not need to use the Montessori curriculum, have Montessori trained teachers or materials to use the Montessori name.  As stated in  the video, anyone can use the name Montessori.

In Maria Montessori schools, there is no homework, no textbooks, no hand-outs….in fact in it’s purest form, I think it will freak out the Singaporean Parent. However, these fundamentals are to encourage the child on a journey of self-discovery, and changing these fundamentals, sounds like just a branding exercise to me…It’s kind of saying that I can help you to get into the gifted program, but in reality, I do not really have the credentials or an of the syllabus to do so.

Personally, I have no problems sending my children to a Montessori School,  as the principals do appeal to me as well. However, with school fees rising as fast as COE prices, there is a definite need to look into this area, or else we will have a big disparity in preschool education offered to the rich and the poor.

It’s the school holidays! And we’re into week 2!

Why do kids love the hols? Top 5 reasons from my Primary 1 girl’s experience:

1. Bedtime is extended BOTH ways. They get to go to bed LATER and get to stay in bed LATER!
2. There’s no school!!!
3. There’s no school!!!
4. There’s no school!!!
5. There’s no school!!!

Well, that’s the kid’s point of view. What’s the parent’s take on school hols?

1. Bedtime is extended BOTH ways. I get to go to bed LATER and get to stay in bed LATER!

2. There’s no school!

3. There’s no school??

4. Can I have more annual leave?

5. Can school start soon, like Tomorrow?

I never thought I would wish for school to start again! It’s just very challenging to keep a 7YO girl entertained 24/7…I can’t imagine when all three of them are in Primary School!

We’ll show you what we’ve been doing this last week…Perhaps we can do some exchange of ideas!

Last week, we managed to catch “Alice in Wonderland” at Forum Galleria, and we thoroughly enjoyed the FREE performance.

As there are lots of other performances happening at the shopping malls, we decided to catch “Thomas the Train” at Millenia Walk.

Needless to say, Nathan was very excited, as he has been playing with Thomas Train Sets since he was a toddler, and Daddy knows his train sets well enough, even to write a review about them.

We arrived at the atrium half an hour before the 1pm performance, and there were already lots of people there.

Parenting Tip:

If you are planning to go for this show, do go early, as they give away Limited Photo-taking coupons with Thomas and the Fat Controller.

Before long, it was time for the performance and we were looking forward to it. The set looked promising and we were ready to be entertained!

We were introduced to the show by a “spunky” young MC, who tried to stir the crowd up in preparation for the cast! I must say, that she did try her best to get the audience moving…

Next up, was the Fat Controller…who was a real disappointment.

First of all, he was not even FAT! …

2ndly, he was not even excited about performing for the children. In fact, he looked like he just “rolled out” of bed, and I did not even notice him smiling…

The 2 of them belted out the famous theme song of “Thomas the Train”, and I think that was the highlight of the performance…

But what about THOMAS? Did he make an appearance…???

He did…But I was disappointed…

As the Cast Shouted out…

Out came Thomas…

Yes…he was just made of wood and his face did not even have varied expressions. Mummy remarked that they have something similar at Toys R Us!

Using a voice-over technique…Thomas made a brief appearance, and the rest of the cast (the two of them) took over.

In fact, the whole performance was less than 10 mins, with the duo cast just singing 2-3 songs and it was all over…(talk about anti-climax).

The Photo-taking session was up next.

This was actually quite a highlight for the kids. However, it was a real pity that I caught the Fat Controller heaving a sigh of “When will this be over”… as the kids were lining up to take a photo with Thomas and him.

Frankly, his lack of excitement showed in his photos, and he just stood there stoic…as the kids went up to take photos with him

 

Therefore, unless your kids are all hardcore “Thomas the Train” fans, I think a trip down to Forum Galleria for “Alice in Wonderland” is much better use of your time!

Performance Details:

• 2-5 Dec, 9-12 Dec.
• Weekdays only at 7pm, Weekends at 1pm and 7pm